In The Weeks To Come

My days have been blurring together lately and in all honesty I haven’t had much to write about. My weeks so far have consisted of leaving for work on Monday at 5pm and working till 5am and back in bed by 6 am every day through Wednesday. Thursday is laundry and date night. Friday during the day I catch up on sleep before work that night at job number 2. Saturday work all day seeing friends when I get done then into my long Sunday. Sunday starts with work at job two from 9-5 then off to from work from 6 to 5 am. I call it my long day because I work almost 22 hours straight.

The weeks blur by, days bleeding into one another. Working midnights has a way of doing that to you. You are always tired, sleep deprived, overly hungry and out of sync. Our bodies are not meant to function this way, its unnatural and hard on us. When I am working those long hours I have only one goal, SLEEP. Oh that sweet deep sleep that replenishes my energy, heals my aches and pains, and resets my brain. That sleep that is so alluded during the week that I can only find on the short brief weekend.

As the days draw closer to the start of this trip I have made a few changes in my schedule. I quit job 2 last week when we had all that wonderful snow. I spent all day in bed goofing off and talking. I am fairly certain I’ve never just laid in bed and didn’t get out for hours. It was and is probably one of the best mornings I have had in such a long time. No place to go, nothing to do, just time to waste and enjoy the moment.

This will be the first weekend I have had to myself in a really long time. I can’t remember a time that I wasn’t working on the weekend or at least part of it. With Kim away I should be able to get some sponsorship stuff done or maybe I can go for a hike if the weather isn’t too frigid. Lately it has been quite wintery, if that is even a word, to do anything outside for long periods of time. I have been meaning to get all my clothes and things condensed and prepacked for a storage unit but I haven’t had time or the weather on my side. There are just a few things left for me to do before I scratch the gypsy itch again.

I feel like I’m just in a holding pattern till April, my mind at work isn’t on work. I think of the trail, life after it, and my relationship. I am hoping to find some clarity in the stillness of the world this summer. While everyone is dealing with rising gas prices, vacations, work, heat, trying to make the most of their little bit of free time, I will be high in the mountains making this memory and living stories to be told when I come home. When I come home, those words are starting to find some meaning now, I am reminded of a song Home Is Wherever I’m With You. With the loss of Roland and the gain of a relationship It has been a very topsy turvy road so far.

In the weeks to come I need to get the last bits in order, stuff stored, moved out, packages made for Kim to send, gps date for Tom. It is strange that for the past six months to a year I have lived, ate, slept all things the Appalachian Trail and as the times draws closer I find myself at a loss for words. I think back to my trip to Europe, nothing seemed real, almost like a dream, an illusion, right up until my flight touched down in Madrid. I exited the plane like I had done on oh so many flights over the years and it was all to familiar. It wasn’t until I had walked out onto the street and looked around. Drawing in a deep breath of foreign air, filling my lungs, looking at all the signs in Spanish that It hit me all at once. This was happening I really was in Spain and I am on my own. Drawing in one more deep breath I quieted my mind and ventured out.

Will this venture be the same, not quite real up to the moment Kevin and I hit the trail head in Georgia? Will upon my departure from my friends, family and Kim be the moment where the weight comes crashing down to me? I do not know the answers to these questions and the many others I have. I do know however, that when it comes I will draw in that deep breath, summoning my courage, and venture forth. In the weeks to come I hope that some of my questions will find their answers and I will continue to move forward with excitement and vigor.

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