Still feeling off

Waking up the next morning I slept more than I had in a few days, but not through the night.  I was still feeling off and headed out with no breakfast. The climb up the first mountain was just that a climb.  I thought of only my hand and foot placement and the misery I was in.  Tired of being beat down by the elements and the trail.  I focused on climbing my way out of my head and the mountain.  I had to reach the outside world, to reach home and see if they could forward my stuff ahead.  Kim would be coming up in a few days and I needed her to either pick it up or have it mailed ahead again. On the top of the mountain, in the overcast windy air, I sat on my phone trying to text out. 

Nothing would work right, I had to retype etc same message over and over before it would send.  I tried to reply to an email four times before I gave up on having it deleted after the five minutes of typing. I ended up just getting a text out with no phone call, nothing would be finalized, I was still in the mist of what was happening next week.  Starting ym climb down I fell into my self pity and walked alone.  My feet so sore from the new shoes ached and pained me at every step.  By the time I reached the bottom I had no choice but to remove my inserts and hope it would create enough space. It helped a little, now I had no support or cushion as I walked over the rocks and roots.  For a while it felt better, then my balls for my feet started to ache.

Feeling hungry for the first time in a day or two I took my time and ate lunch by a pond.  Taking in my solitude and fighting my thoughts I sat and rested. I figured the others were far ahead and moved at my own pace.  When I reached the river crossing I was surprised to see them there on the other side waiting.  Eating the river and not wanting to get wet again, I looked for a new route.  I surveyed a stone hop and made my way carefully across the stones across to the other shore. For once I wasn’t wet and cold.  The other two headed off and I followed behind.  It won’t long before they out paced my and disappeared into the woods.  I was even more surprised when I looked up to see Earthling waiting for me in the middle of the trail. She wanted to hike with me for a change and I enjoyed having the company.

The next mountain was long and painful as I limped in silence up the steep rocks and roots.  Rain had started to come down and made the evening more miserable for me than the previous day.  I focused on climbing and getting to shelter for the night.  By the time I reached the top of the mountain I could barely walk straight.  The time without inserts and squeezed in my shoes had hurt my feet so much that I couldn’t walk.  I hobbled up and over rocks and down the backside of the mountain. My only relief came when we hit flat ground, where my feet were not pushed forward or trying to balance themselves. It went that way all the way to the shelter, which meant we had a big day the next day to get to Monson Maine. I tried to get some sleep in the big bag and ate another meal.  The loud rain on the tin roof allowed little sleep for the night. Again I would not sleep.

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